To say I have taken a break from blogging would be an understatement. Life has just been busy and finding time to sit in front of the computer has been more than I can focus on.
However, as I was writing in my journal tonight (I've tried to continue that at least), I felt the need to share my feelings publicly. It took me a few minutes to remember how to log into my blog account, but I finally did it. And here goes..
My confession: I have been pretty grumpy!
Of course, I can blame some of my grumpiness on your basic pregnancy hormones. Or the fact that it's so hot and humid outside no one wants to play. Or the fact that my husband has worked CrAzY hours this summer so that I feel like a single mom. Or that I haven't been as diligent on my scripture study and prayers since pregnancy got in the way.
Or we can just combine them all together because it's all true.
But Sunday was a good day. Well, most of it was...
At church, I felt like a few people went out of their way to stop and talk to me. I am often away from my normal church family and traveling to other churches throughout the year. This can cause me to feel like a fish out of water on Sundays when I am at "home" since I don't see the other members as often. To have 3 or 4 people stop and talk to me and ask questions about me and my family made me feel special, missed, and loved.
Then I went to Relief Society (the women's class at church) and the lesson was on an incredible talk given by President Dieter F. Uchtdorf titled "The Gift of Grace". The lesson and talk reminded me that the gift of our Savior's Atonement isn't just for forgiveness of our sins. But it is there to comfort, to allow blessings to be poured out, and to feel our Heavenly Father's love. It's is there to lift us up - to "unlock the gates of heaven and open the windows of heaven."
I left the class feeling uplifted and renewed! My heart needed those words to realize that it's ok. That I have the opportunity to turn to my Heavenly Father for love and comfort when I'm feeling grumpy.
And then I went home ... where the children whined and I burnt the grilled cheese.
I am so grateful for tomorrows. For being able to start again. For having the Savior's atonement work for me. When I can't do it all, He is there to make up the difference.
I know that I can do hard things. I know that someone else's "hard thing" might be harder than my "hard thing", but that as long as I am learning from my personal journey, I am moving upward.
School started today for my oldest. And my second will be starting school on Thursday. Today brought changes and routine and I know that is what my heart, my mind, and my body needed. Tomorrow, I will work towards being even better than today.
