Grumpy Beare Confessions

To say I have taken a break from blogging would be an understatement. Life has just been busy and finding time to sit in front of the computer has been more than I can focus on. 

However, as I was writing in my journal tonight (I've tried to continue that at least), I felt the need to share my feelings publicly. It took me a few minutes to remember how to log into my blog account, but I finally did it. And here goes..

My confession: I have been pretty grumpy!

Of course, I can blame some of my grumpiness on your basic pregnancy hormones. Or the fact that it's so hot and humid outside no one wants to play. Or the fact that my husband has worked CrAzY hours this summer so that I feel like a single mom. Or that I haven't been as diligent on my scripture study and prayers since pregnancy got in the way.

Or we can just combine them all together because it's all true.

But Sunday was a good day. Well, most of it was...

At church, I felt like a few people went out of their way to stop and talk to me. I am often away from my normal church family and traveling to other churches throughout the year. This can cause me to feel like a fish out of water on Sundays when I am at "home" since I don't see the other members as often. To have 3 or 4 people stop and talk to me and ask questions about me and my family made me feel special, missed, and loved.

Then I went to Relief Society (the women's class at church) and the lesson was on an incredible talk given by President Dieter F. Uchtdorf titled "The Gift of Grace". The lesson and talk reminded me that the gift of our Savior's Atonement isn't just for forgiveness of our sins. But it is there to comfort, to allow blessings to be poured out, and to feel our Heavenly Father's love. It's is there to lift us up - to "unlock the gates of heaven and open the windows of heaven."

I left the class feeling uplifted and renewed! My heart needed those words to realize that it's ok. That I have the opportunity to turn to my Heavenly Father for love and comfort when I'm feeling grumpy.

And then I went home ... where the children whined and I burnt the grilled cheese. 

I am so grateful for tomorrows. For being able to start again. For having the Savior's atonement work for me. When I can't do it all, He is there to make up the difference. 

I know that I can do hard things. I know that someone else's "hard thing" might be harder than my "hard thing", but that as long as I am learning from my personal journey, I am moving upward. 

School started today for my oldest. And my second will be starting school on Thursday. Today brought changes and routine and I know that is what my heart, my mind, and my body needed. Tomorrow, I will work towards being even better than today.

A Moment

I have a confession:

 I have a weak stomach, in a sense...

When it come to CSI, Bones, and NCIS, I can handle it! These are some of my favorite murder-mystery shows that may display some bloody, bone-exposed, and scarred body parts. But they don't bother me so much.

However, someone starts vomiting profusely and I begin dry-heaving!

So when my sweet children began showing signs of the stomach bug, my usually rock solid stomach became queasy.

I've been cleaning sheets, changing clothes, wiping butts, filling cups and snuggling sickies. They have each taken a turn being sick, but luckily, mom and dad have sidestepped this ugly bug. 

There is even more of a silver lining I have found. Lately, we have been very busy. Trying to get ready for a kitchen remodel (more to come on that soon), many appointments, play dates, gym time, and more laundry. So busy that we really haven't been spending much quality time together. 

This household stomach bug has forced the hubby and me to slow down and take care of our family. 

For the past couple of days, we have had to "enjoy the moment." Even though it hasn't been a glorious moment, we have still enjoyed the snuggles, the Dora reruns, and some extra storytime. 

Sorry, no pictures today ... we were just enjoying our time together!

The Bad Word

I have a confession ... 

I said a bad word!

But let me defend myself -

I'm making a cake for an activity for the ladies at church. It, of course, is a very chocolatey cake. Maecie was in the kitchen with me, eyeing every piece of chocolate goodness I was putting in the recipe. I gave her a few chocolate chips in hopes that it would pacify her until I could get lunch going. Unfortunately, those chocolate chips just made her want more and more.

After she asked for more chocolate, I told her we would have lunch in just a bit and she needed to wait. She proceeded to ask for more chocolate and say that she didn't want lunch, just chocolate. 

My sweet little girl was asking over and over and over for more candy, more chocolate. I was going as fast as I could to get this cake in the oven and baking and was starting to get a little frustrated. Finally, I looked at Maecie and told her that my answer was "No. No, she could not have more chocolate and she would have to wait until after lunch." And I was firm in my delivery.

She lowered her head and ran to her room. A few minutes later I heard her singing and went to check on her.

She had lined up her dolls on her bed and she was singing this song {don't forget to sing this in the most pitiful 2 year old voice you can muster}, "I want some chocolate. But Mommy won't give me some. Mommy said a bad word!"

"What bad word did I say, Maecie?", I asked. Continuing to sing, Maecie responded, "Mommy told me no. Mommy said a bad word!"

Yes, ladies and gents, this mommy said, "No"! How could I have done such a thing? How could I have said such a bad word in front of my daughter? Well, honestly, it's because I'm a mean mommy. Any time my children want to spoil their appetites with junk food, I tell them no. If they want to watch TV before doing homework, or refuse to do their chores because they want to go play, I tell them "No". I don't give in to their every plea. This may make me a mean mommy, but it's who I am and how I parent.

In my opinion, parents need to say this bad word from time to time. We can't always give our children what they want because then they will grow up expecting to get what they have always gotten. Instead, we need to show them that there are boundaries in life. It might not seem like that would be the lesson learned, but it is a start. 

I love my kiddos and their ability to call me out when I've said a "bad word"! 

**Don't worry, I hugged my sweet girl, told her I loved her. Then we ate lunch and played princess tea party.**

Steps and Steps

Holy Hiatus, Batman! 

I have been so incredibly busy that typing information into my computer has been pretty low on the totem pole. BUT, I would really like to change that.

Confession #1 of the 2013 year {in February, no less}:

I like to count my steps! 

No, I do not sit there and physically count my steps all day long. I wear a pedometer. The brand I use is called a fitbit and it is on my person 24 hours a day!

The nifty little contraption can fit just about anywhere from your pants pocket to your bra strap. 

This little pedometer not only tells me how many steps I take a day, but how many calories I burn, how many flights of stairs I climb, how many miles I walk, and the time. At night, it can track how many times I wake up during my sleep. {So interesting to compare nights you feel more rested than others!} And best of all, I can track my daily, weekly, and even monthly progress online.

A big plus, while I'm still battling with this baby weight, is that I can also track my calorie intake ON MY iPHONE!!! How awesome is that?! 

My daily goal is to have 7,000-10,000 steps a day ... 7,000 is fairly easy to get if you are moving constantly throughout the day. But 10,000 usually only comes on days I go to the gym. {I have stepped as many as 12,000 steps in a day, but my feet were sore by the end of the day!!}

And of course, it's almost like a game. What is the highest percentage of my goal that I can attain in a day/week? If I'm close to meeting another 500-1,000 steps, you could see me walking/jogging/dancing in my room before bed. I may be extremely exhausted, but my desire achieve my goal supersedes my desire for sleep. I. MUST. HAVE. MORE. STEPS! 

Honestly, I feel more energized and active because of my need to count steps! 

**These are my own opinions. I was not compensated for this post, just wanted to share my love for this product and how it has helped me in my life!**

Best Family Night!

Friday night was the best family night! 

Confession: We don't have a ton of "planned" family nights. Our family time usually consists of McD's or a movie before bed. But that's just the business of life right now. So when we do have a planned event, I get a little excited.

Friday was the day we went to see Santa! It's kind of our family Christmas tradition now.{ I guess if you do it the same way three years in a row, it's tradition, right?!} 

First, we visited Santa at Bass Pro Shop ... aka ... the fish store. He is the cutest Santa and they always do such a great job with pics! No one complains if you take your own pictures and they still give you a freebie! And he really listens to what the kids have to say....always a big plus!

Aren't they the CUTEST kids ever?? Or maybe I'm just a little biased!

Then, of course, we visit the fish!

And after all of that excitement, we eat dinner at Steak and Shake! That's how I convince my hubby to going out on a Friday at Christmas time. {He really dislikes traffic and huge crowds of people} 

We finished the night with a trip to the Dollar Store! Maecie found everything princess, Clayton found everything Superhero, and Mom got great stocking stuffers while Dad and Lucie perused the aisles. And of course, Clayton entertained all of the workers with his stories and explanations of everything he was purchasing.

We went early {right at 4:30pm or so}, made sure everyone had eaten, and had many distractions {fish, rides on daddy's shoulders, taking pictures with mom's phone, and straws!} It was a fabulous night. My favorite family tradition!

Gratitude Wrap-Up

So I dropped the ball on my 30 days of gratitude posts. Things got busy and a little out of control (so to say). But I thought about all that I was thankful for on a daily basis! Some of the highlights:

1. My children - Clayton who bring laughter and excitement to our home on a daily basis. Maecie who is teaching me all about how to be a princess. Lucie who is the sweetest, most cuddly baby ever!
2. My family who loves me unconditionally.
3. My parents, grandparents, and in-laws who have loved, taught and supported me in every endeavor.
4. My home and  the shelter it provides our family from the elements. It may not always be in pristine condition, but we feel safe here.
5. My gift of baking. I really enjoy baking and I love even more when my baking can bring comfort to others.
6. My large suburban that is able to carry my children, luggage when needed, a trip home from Costco and more, yet still keep my family and I safe from any crazies on the road.
7. Family togetherness ... when I was 16 years old and my aunt and uncle and grandparents moved into the same town my family and I lived in, I thought we had too much family together time. Now, I wish there could be more!
8. The gifts God has blessed me with - music, food, desire to serve others - and how they bring me closer to my Heavenly Father, my children, my husband, my extended family and my church family.

I guess all in all, you can say my family - far and near - and my blessings from God are the things I am most thankful for. Whether I accomplish all on my to-do list or not, whether I have the latest and greatest or not, I am blessed beyond measure!

30 Days of Gratitude - Day 7

Today I'm thankful for my job. Yes, technically I am a stay-at-home-mom and am so lucky to have that job. But this year I picked up something a little more my musical style.

I have the opportunity to teach music to preschoolers (ages 1-5) two times a week. They even help take care of my girls while I am there, allowing me some time doing something I love.

Music has always been a love of mine. I've sung in choirs and such since I was 10 years old. And there is something magical about seeing a two year old with a big smile on their face while they are bobbing their head in rhythm to "Old McDonald Had a Farm'"

And somehow, these children are teaching me. You see, the preschool is at a church and during the time I am there, I get to share a little spiritual message with the kids. They may not be the same denomination as I am, and they may not be the same denomination as the preschool. Yet, we are learning about God and His love for each one of us.

Last month we talked about the love Jesus Christ has for us. I told the kids I was going to show them a picture of someone Jesus loves. I then passed around a mirror and asked the kids who was in the picture. The smiles on their faces was priceless! And each child knew that they were loved.

Not long after I began these lessons, I realized I needed to be doing that same thing for my children. So of course, I implemented a little spiritual message in our home on a daily basis (well, that's my intentions anyway!). I feel like it has truly made a difference in our home.

It may not pay the bills .... it may not be the highest caliber of learning .... however, I love my job and am thankful for the things I learn from these kids daily!